Everything Works Out

Except for me.

Generally speaking, I do not like working out. Never have. My high school cross country team would joke with our coach that we were the only team in the league that hated running. Really. It got to the point where she tried to convince some girls to quit the team and then on our bus ride to league finals led us in a prayer to St. Jude (the patron saint of lost causes). Thanks for the vote of confidence, coach!

I played basketball and softball throughout my youth. As evidenced by my senior year “Most Inspirational” award in softball, basketball was my sport. But once high school was over, my commitment to sports and exercise dwindled. I joined the crew team my first semester of college. I was in the best shape of my life that semester; I also ate more in that semester than every other semester of undergrad combined. Since then, I  have only motivated myself to get any exercise by spending money– social sports leagues, Groupon gym memberships (I would never pay a full-priced gym membership), and race registrations. Otherwise, working out is not really in the cards for me.


These are my DVDs. Some of them are still in plastic. I'll give you a hint, it's not When Harry Met Sally.

My roommates have, on several occasions, invited me to exercise with them.

“You going for a run?”

“Yeah. You wanna come?”

Without hesitation, “Nope.”

But I am a reasonable and educated person– I know it’ll all catch up to me (it already is), so I should change my attitude towards exercise. To that end, I just received a Groupon Goods order I made a few weeks ago– a yoga kit. Yoga and I have a sordid past. I have said many unkind things about it, and I am certain it talks about me behind my back. But I believe change is possible; yoga and I can get along.

The day it arrived I pulled everything out: mat, strap, resistance band, ball, and DVD. Not really sure what everything was or how it was used, specifically the resistance band (a long strip of bathing cap material), I popped in the DVD to find out and to try and follow along. As I attempted yoga, still a rocky relationship, I simultaneously was glad no one else was around and wished that someone was. Glad to be by myself because, well, this is just embarrassing. And wishing I had company because, well, this is just hilarious.

I swear to you, at one point the woman held her hands together and swung them up over her head, behind her back, and back under her feet, not entirely unlike King Louie in The Jungle Book (1:18).

Okay, so she didn’t actually use her arms as a jumprope, but she did get them just about halfway there. And I did try. And trying is half the battle.

Or is it knowing? …

Trying is three-quarters of the battle.

Categories: Day to Day, Look at Me, I'm Growing!, the Human Condition, The Regulars | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

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2 thoughts on “Everything Works Out

  1. Mama

    All I know is that you’re heck-a fast!

  2. You know me……I love yoga and am certain it was not talking behind your back. It was just patiently waiting for you to come around. I do wish I could have been there to see it. I can only imagine (and wet my pants a little.)

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