Lists #3 and #4: The List of Things That Make Me Inconsolably Frustrated and The List of Alternative Phrases to Express Your Anger

This double list post was inspired by an incredibly frustrating effort to open a can of chili at work.

I’m not just talking about being mad, the frustration I am talking about is the kind where you are afraid to open your mouth because of the likely chance that your voice would break the sound barrier with expletives and unnecessary vulgarity. This kind of anger is usually inspired by inanimate objects, not people. I tend to have more patience with people. Here is the list of those objects and situations:

1. Crappy can openers, especially when hungry.

2. Jammed paper in copy machines or printers, especially when it happens repeatedly.

3.  Trying to make a decision with a group of indifferent people.

4. Stupid injuries (e.g. stubbed toe, bruised shin, bumped head on the under side of a desk when you’ve bent over to pick something up, etc.), especially when others witness it.

5. Slow or non-functional internet access.

6. Losing something or having something stolen. St. Anthony can only do so much.

And as a resource guide, here are a list of things that I have heard people say in order to avoid aforementioned expletives and unnecessary vulgarities:

1. “Sugar!” -compliments of Grandma and Grandpa.

2. “Heavens to Betsy!” also compliments of Grandma. “Betsy” has also often been replaced with “Murgatroid” (sp?).

3. “Jezus, Marya Józefy Święty!” (Polish for “Holy Jesus, Mary and Joseph”) compliments of my mother.

4. “Fiddlesticks!” compliments of my father.

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Categories: Life in Lists, Look at Me, I'm Growing! | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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4 thoughts on “Lists #3 and #4: The List of Things That Make Me Inconsolably Frustrated and The List of Alternative Phrases to Express Your Anger

  1. Aunt Michele (and sponsor)

    5. How about “notafinga!” (sp?) courtesy of Aunt Annie. Well really I guess, its
    from “A Christmas Story” but who’s really checking. I believe she has made
    it her own.

    6. Lord love a duck! also from Aunt Annie but I believe it originally came out of
    the Norris camp.

    • the wonder herself

      I’d say that’s the appropriate spelling, and great additions. I love “NOTAFINGA!” One that I would like to work into my vernacular.

  2. Aunt Mary

    First, I must add paper cut to Stupid Injuries (#4) since I got not one, but two, in the past week. As an aside, did you know the human hair, most often during washing, fits just perfectly into a paper cut? Ouch all over again.

    How can we forget “Sacramento, California!” compliments of your Grandpa … who always said it with an inexplicable accent! Then, there’s “For the love of Pete,” compliments of Uncle Pat. (Does anyone know the infamous Pete and why it is we do things out of love for him?)

    And if I may add one more from one of my favorite people, my old boss Mr. Boswell, who would just blurt, “Oh dirty word,” to avoid offending anyone.

  3. theoldman

    hey! howsabout “jimimny christmas” and “jumpin’ jehosaphat”? Also as yet unmentioned “Holy Mackerel” as well as the ever popular “sonofagun”! ciao

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