That’s the Way the Toilet Paper Rolls

It didn’t even occur to me that there was more than one way to put toilet paper on the holder or that someone would prefer one way over the other until I heard the hosts of a morning radio show discuss it on my way to school one morning in high school. I was dumbfounded that they had more than a few callers-in who adamantly, as if a matter of morality, declared that one way was better. And now I am ashamed to admit that it drives me secretly crazy when the free end of the TP comes from underneath instead of on top. It’s irrational, I know.

This is not a passive aggressive roommate note, I promise. I know I’m crazy. I deal with it.

What this is is an observation about just how crazy I am. How is it that I can so strongly prefer one thing over another, when at one point in my life I was completely oblivious of its existence?

How’s this for a toilet paper holder?

The way the toilet paper sits on its holder, jelly in the peanut butter jar, the way one builds a campfire…

I have created my ways of doing things and developed my preferences throughout my 28 years here and you know what? Just as easily as they were created and developed, they can change.

So when I have a hard time finding the end of the toilet paper because it’s hiding on the backside of the roll waiting to come out from the disease-ridden TP cave in the bathroom wall, I take a deep breath, resist the urge to turn the roll around and remind myself that everything’s okay.

Maybe one day I’ll prefer it that way…

Naahhh… Let’s not get too crazy!

Still Nothing is Permanent

Temporary graffiti artist at it again.

My local temporary graffiti artist has come out after a long cold lonely winter to remind us once again that nothing is permanent. This time the reminder comes on the wall of my local bar that used to sell $1 pints of PBR and earlier this year upped it to $2. Nothing, in fact, is permanent.

I must be cosmically linked to the person who leaves these messages about my neighborhood, because this comes at just the right time. I just graduated from my graduate program, decided that I would stay a little longer in Chicago instead of moving back to California right away, and began my second full-time job search in my lifetime. Indeed, nothing is permanent and life is full of transitions.

After a whirlwind of final papers, graduation ceremonies, and celebrations, the celebratory dust is beginning to settle and I am returning to “normal” life.  The problem is, THERE IS NO NORMAL!

Never has been and never will be. This is a direct result of the impermanence of everything. How can there be a normal if nothing stays the same?

So in addition to the reminder of impermanence, I am reminding myself to get off my back and have fun in this life in between because there are no “shoulds” or “musts”, only exploration and uncovering what is new and possible.

Speaking of True Love

When I was a middle schooler, even more awkward than I am today (if you can believe it), I had my aunt to thank for a lot of my street cred (which I think I just lost for saying street cred).

“Oh, yeah, my aunt recorded a CD, whatever. She’s gonna be famous.”

And I can’t even begin to tell you how I begged and pleaded and cried and whined to be able to go see her play in coffee shops and any other venues that allowed me. If my mom said yes, I would try to look as cool as possible. This usually meant that I would dig out my overalls with the rose embroidered on the front pocket. I’m lucky I wore a uniform to school daily, otherwise those overalls would have been worn out. I digress.

The point is, she drove a VW bug with a sun roof, bought Big Gulps, played guitar in coffee shops and had boyfriends named Forest (I honestly do not remember anything else about him, except that his name was Forest). She was cool, she was fun… and she was MY. AUNT.

Now I’m a little less awkward and slightly older and I don’t know where my rose-embroidered overalls are. But one thing I do know is that my aunt is still cool and fun (though no more VW bugs or boyfriends with funny names) and she still writes wonderful music that I would beg and plead and cry and whine to see her play.

So without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, Michele Ryan…

She is on a mission to record her second album of love songs for the whole family called ‘Home Now.’ All of her leg work is done and she is so close to her finished product and now needs the support of her community, her network, her family and friends to get these songs out to a world, who doesn’t know it yet, but needs them. So listen and fall in love and bring ‘Home Now’ to life!